Weight Loss and Faith
When I want a good laugh I get on the scale. I thought purchasing one a few months ago would help me restart my long lost fitness journey. Instead, it made me obsess – weighing myself twice a day, every day even when I hadn't done a thing for it to change.
I must've expected this 20 pounds of "relationship weight" to disappear into thin air.
Yesterday morning I needed a laugh, so after staring at my scale for 20 seconds I hopped on. When I looked at the digital numbers that flashed across the screen, laughing was the last thing I did.
"How the heck did that happen?"
I asked myself in disbelief at the 8 pounds I lost. While my eating habits remained the same (pretty good), I hadn't worked out in weeks. I hadn't even driven past the gym! Yet there I was, re-weighing myself just to make sure there wasn't an error.
Nope, that's 8 pounds alright.
I spent months worrying about weight loss and fitness. Months trying to measure what I ate, pay attention to macros, and figure out how to keep my hair in good condition, but still break a much needed sweat at the gym. I tried cleanses, crash diets and the Pinterest squat and ab challenges. See, this journey wasn't new for me—I'd gone through two fitness trainers and several workout groups, I knew exactly how to use machines and modify workout—but after getting lazy, and hitting a long-standing plateau, I was discouraged. Working hard, eating right and seeing no results can do that to you.
I obsessed over what I should eat until I finally chose to be happy. I decided to stop micromanaging my diet and to instead just treat my body better. I chose to stop hating my body and learned to love it the way it was. I learned to love how the extra 20 filled out my buttocks and shaped me up a little bit more. I learned to love the extra 20 because it didn't make me a different woman than I already was. I learned to love it because doing things out of hate will never end in success. I learned to love it because when you love yourself fully, you make better decisions—this decision being my health.
I stopped creeping into the bathroom to weigh myself. I stopped talking about how much weight I gained. I stopped feeling bad for ordering french fries to accompany my salad. I stopped stressing and let it be. And no sooner than I had done that, I was down 8 lbs.
What does this have to do with faith?
When I gave up control I got exactly what I wanted. When I stopped obsessing, things happened. When I left well enough alone and grew content with what I had and who I was, I got what I had long been praying for. When I learned to love my situation, in spite of what it looked like, it got better.
And, while letting go of my unhealthy obsession with weight loss wasn't an I'm-relying-on-faith-for-these-changes type of thing, it is a resemblance of how faith works; of how letting go, and letting God works.
When you stop trying to micromanage God, you allow Him the freedom He needs to do His mighty work. When you let go, you allow Him the space He needs to do miraculous things. We cannot control everything. Some things we must leave up to God. Some things, are not ours to control, fix, or lose. Some of these battles, aren't ours. And the sooner we realize that the sooner we allow His power to make the change we desperately want.